Friday, February 29, 2008

I've Been Tagged

I've been tagged. Only...I changed it up a little. Hope no one's ticked.

10 Years Ago...I was 13. So that means I was in eighth grade, buying beef jerkey from Jeff Sorensen, trying not to get caught in the "Dungeons and Dragons" Accelerated Reader scandal and in love with...let's just say Jim Vosburgh for good measure.

5 Years Ago...I was 18. So I was getting ready to graduate high school-soaking up as much Pam Coburn as possible, searching the underground tunnels of DHS with Chelsea Bennett's video camera, and trying to avoid Nate Neagle and Co.

5 Things That Are (or were) On My To Do List Today...
*Watch The George Michael Show
*Drink a Diet Coke or two or three
*Work (aka interview some crazies and some non-crazies)
*See Vantage Point with J.Fry

5 Things People Don't Know About Me:
*Grape soda is one of my top 3 favorite drinks but I rarely drink it.
*I love the smell of school books.
*I secretly love the salad bar at Sizzler. Sorry.
*I don't feel like I'm 23. Instead I feel like I'm 17...only not as retarded.
*The best compliments I can get are as follows: "Hey, you look really tan", "Your hair is getting so long", "Well said", or "Hey, what you just did reminded me of Keith!"-Keith is my brother and I think Annie would agree on this one.

I tag: Annie and Jason Winn (that's right, I said Jason too), Hip Hopera aka Ryann Edwards, Jenny Payne, and Karen Cannon.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

{George Michael}

Thank you, Leia for showing me the light. I'm jealous I didn't find this first. My boyfriend, George Michael Bluth, has his own show on the web. It's pretty dynamite. Please watch every episode and enjoy.

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Feliz Cumpleanos

Sunday the 24th of February is Carly Johnston-Young's birthday. In honor of this event, I've decided to recount one of my favorite memories of Carly:

Once upon a time at Mrs. Auernig's house in 1999, some friends and I dared Carly to eat an entire cube of butter for $50 (we were all going to chip in). Now, Carly has never been scared of calories or fat content, not even a little bit, so of course she took the dare. Now picture this-about a dozen 14-year-old girls circled up around Carly-chanting and cheering her on as she is trying to force this thing down her throat. She almost got it too (except she couldn't because it was too slippery). Watching her trying to swallow that thing was probably one of the funniest things I've ever seen. I think we even paid her $25 for her efforts.

Anyway, Carly is everything Joyce and I wish we could be. (In the voice): Carly. Happy Birthday.

Friday, February 22, 2008

The Joys of Human Resources

For my job, I am constantly looking through resumes and conducting interviews with potential employees. I have been doing this for a few months but I'm still shocked at how people conduct themselves during an interview and what they will write on their resumes. Here are a few of my favorites:

Emails/misc facts I have found on resumes:

  • studmanluv69@......

  • monkeywitch@....

  • mcshits_house_of_love@...

  • motherrucker@...

  • One guy claimed he was an "Ambassador of Religion to France" for 2 years aka served a mission.

  • Under hobbies and interests: "I've made mistakes but hey, I'm not Mother Teresa, ok?!"...actually this turned out to be a fake resume, but hilarious nonetheless.

Felonies potential employees have been charged with:

  • Possession of marijuana and a sword

Things people have admitted (totally unsolicited from me) in interviews:

  • They were just diagnosed with Hepetitis C, and have had it for 15 years-without having any idea there was a problem...until their skin turned yellow.

  • Their "baby mama" just started having contractions. Oh...the time old tale of baby mama drama...

  • That, in prison, all the sex offenders get beat up and "knifed" in the yard. No one likes a sex offender!

  • (Upon poking at his teeth for most of the interview) He let me know that he was just getting used to his new denchers (this guy was no older than 25 and I'm pretty sure he was a big fan of the crystal meth). Yes I did have to shake his hand afterward and yes I did scrub my hand with steel wool. I ordered a code red on myself.

Needless to say my job keeps me fairly entertained.

Friday, February 15, 2008

I Have a Crush on Russia

I've devoted a lot of time lately reading a book that is written by a friend of the Elison family-Mike Ramsdell. It's called A Train to Potevka, and it's about his crazy adventures as a CIA agent in The Soviet Union in the 1980s. He's just bringing down Communism one mob boss at a time. Don't be fooled by my description-this book is totally non-fiction. Anyway, I like it because not only is he running around doing all the awesome CIA things, but he gives great background on Russian history. After I read it I just want to talk about the TransSiberian Highway and the KGB/Russian Mafia for hours. I'm fascinated by it. There's also an Australian film company making a movie about it. Guess who they want to play Mike? Just Russell Crowe. Not a big deal. Anyway, it's outta sight (so far), but you don't have to take my word for it (duh nuh nuh)!

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

The Coalition of Mormon Mothers

I got an email today about how the new dollar (it's in coin form) does not include the phrase "In God We Trust". It then went on to say how you should not accept those coins-and in doing so this will force the US government to recall all the coins and think twice about demoralizing our money.
I always get forwards like these (I find them hilarious) and when I do I like to picture a group of superheroes in their secret lair-only instead of Batman and Superman and the like-it's the Coalition of Mormon Mothers. Their uniform: a velour jumpsuit with matching mask, big hair and acrylic nails. Their mission: to fly around the globe, putting an end to such evils as the new dollar, The Golden Compass, and the any liberal speakers scheduled to come to UVSC (ie the Michael Moore incident of 2005). But they don't stop there. The Mormon Mothers still make it home in time to make cookies for the kids and scrapbook their latest adventure. You go girls.
Anyways, if you know someone who makes Mormon movies, maybe suggest this plot to them. I'm sure it would make a killing at the box office.

Saturday, February 9, 2008

Guten tag.

Welcome to my blog. In the future, I will be blogging about the following:

*Culture (anything from High School to Utah Valley to Korea-prepare yourselves)
*Inventions I have thought up/books I plan on writing.
*Friends and various Davis High Alumni.
*New discoveries (ie awesome stores such as Many Lands or restaurants such as Pudding on the Rice).
*Random things I learn on the street. should be good-stay tuned. Feel free to comment/stalk/enlighten your friends and/or family.